Grocery stores a major topic for father – Columbia Daily Tribune

My father and I were sitting at his kitchen counter over cocktails the other day when the conversation turned to grocery shopping. I know this might seem an odd subject matter for a 77 year-old man and his son to be having, but ever since Dad’s retirement six months ago, he’s become an expert on a wide range of exciting new topics: how to properly cook moonshine without burning it (you can’t); the pros and cons of roundabouts (there are no pros); why we have solar eclipses (scientific misinformation). He has nothing better to do, so I always sit idly by and listen to his ruminations.

“You know, grocery stores are amazing places,” he told me. “I’ve been married to your mother for 55 years and we’ve never had a shred of edible food in the house until now.”

I motioned toward their pantry, where the 42 inch shelves were bowed from the weight of the accumulated inventory. “That’s the stuff your mother has bought over the years at Sam’s Club,” he snapped. “Ten dozen cans of tuna fish, 30

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